disaster to relaxer.

first off, let me just say.. i love sitting in the comfy chair in the living room, a nice warm and very sweet cup of coffee next to me, and the most cuddly little dog curled up in my lap. ah, comfort. for this little moment, i'm not a crazy whack from deployment. normal life is coming.. soon.

yesterday wasn't my day. when i told seth that i felt like i should go back to bed.. i totally should have.

after running to town, the jeep kinda exploded. that's the best word i have to describe it. smoke/steam is never good. and of course, i know absolutely nothing. i made it home though and after calling my inlaws and mom and i attempting to put our heads together, we figured out it's either the radiator, water pump, or a hose. it goes to the shop tomorrow.

i knew seth wouldn't be upset with me, but i did dread having another conversation that had to be had now and would involve more details for me to figure out. but i got a little bit more than just that. i go tons of reassurance. promises and reassurance.

instant relax button. seth and i decided that i'd take the jeep to the shop tomorrow.. and let whatever they say and how long it takes to fix be the decider of when i move. it seems that there are many pros and cons either way.. so we're just waiting.

i've never in my life gotten up, and then gone back to bed and stayed their most of the day.. but i did yesterday. i realized that i have no energy. no filter. no emotional control. so being that i have no working vehicle for the next couple of days, it's probably in humanities best interest to leave me at home since i would probably begin to cry when i messed up ordering lunch.

i've done absolutely nothing productive.. minus one load of laundry. there's nothing to do. things have been packed, closet cleaned out, my car is gone.. it's just a waiting game.

with the storm this afternoon, i took some of my endless time to get online and find a bunch of DIY projects that i want to complete. isn't seth going to be excited to come home to a restless housewife that has a million ideas? i think yes.

i'm so ready. maybe that's why God's giving me this extra time. i have been able just to think about how blessed i am today. blessed for the reassurance from seth today. and i know i'm being impatient, and i'm sorry to inform you that that will not change.. i'm just ready. XX days = 3%

so in the time that i've taken to write this post, my cuddly dog mentioned earlier? yeah, she's knocked off a lamp and completely broke it. AND chased the cat around my chair probably at least 30 times...

comfort, yes, still.

relaxer.. not so much. to the backyard you go, lucy loo.